So, how many religions are there, anyway? Go ahead....take a guess. Well, what the internet tells us is that there are anywhere from 4,000 to 10,000 different religions, which includes churches, congregations, faith groups, tribes, cultures and movements. And that might not include relgions that are no longer around. I know it doesn't work this way, but if you were to divide the population of the earth by that higher number of 10,000, that would give each relgion over 3/4 of a million followers. Obviously, there are a few religions which have far more, and a majority that have far less.
I've been interested in spirituality and religion for a very long time, going back to young chldhood and more seriously in my teenage years where I would read books on ESP, hypnosis, or whatever I could find that I thought would provide answers. Later in college, I did an independent learning contract at Evergreen on Comparative Religions, where I explored primarily Christianity, Hinduism and Buddhism. Realistically, it was a fairly light weight study, and mostly done to satisfy my own interests in Truth. But it was through that study that I was introduced to Bhagavad Gita and became a Hare Krishna monk for some years.
Some years later, after the Spiritual Master passed away and the whole thing became even crazier than it was, and I delved into a variety of other paths and processes in a search for Truth. But one of the things that I recognized is that to a very large degree, we can't know the truth of these 10,000 religions. Which are true and which are false? Are any true? Are they ALL true? Some are diametrically opposed to others. Following them is a matter of faith. And while faith is a extremely powerful thing, it doesn't necessarily satisfy that desire to KNOW what is true.
But the other thing I realized is, does it even matter what the truth out THERE is, if I don't even know WHO I AM? Does it matter what I believe if I don't know what I am. This thing called "I" is the foundation upon which EVERYTHING rests. Our entire lives are based on "I". I AM so and so. I WANT so and so. But what IS that "I". Thus began my journey into Self Inquiry.
What is amazing is that we are that "I". We don't have to, and shouldn't, accept any beliefs about it. We are that and can inquiry INTO that "I", to fully discover who we are. So even right now....
WHO IS READING THIS? (I AM)
For most people, the word "I" is simply a given. Or when they call themselves "I", they're referring to the whole package - the body, the mind, the thoughts, the feelings, etc. It's just this nebulous "I-ness" with it's ups and downs, goods and bads, happy days, sad days and so on. But that is NOT what the "I" is. "I" is that which is AWARE of all those things.
WHO IS AWARE OF READING THIS RIGHT NOW? (I AM)
Nisargadatta Maharaja, an Indian teacher who passed away in 1981, presented some of the best understandings of this:
"The 'I am' came first, it's ever-present, ever available, refuse all thoughts except 'I am', stay there."
or, "Consistently and with perserverance separate the 'I am' from 'this' or 'that', just keep in mind the feeling 'I am'."
The great benefit is that "I am" is never not with you. You ARE that I am.
WHO IS AWARE OF CONFUSION AT THIS MOMENT? (I AM)
At first, it might seem strange. It can be difficult to separate "I" from all the things you associate with yourself, particularly your thoughts and emotions. But you are NOT your thoughts OR emotions - you are AWARE of your thoughts and emotions.
WHO IS AWARE OF THOUGHTS AND EMOTIONS? (I AM)
Self inquiry is NOT a religion, nor a set of beliefs. In fact, an important aspect of Self inquiry is letting go of beliefs, as they, to a huge extent, are what makes up your false persona. (Persona means 'mask' or literally to sound-through - as in the old Greek masks that actors wore while performing.) So nearly everything that you consider 'you' are simply your beliefs and ideas. In fact, one of the dictionary definitions of 'Belief' is a 'habit of the mind'.
Now this is definitely not meant to say that religious beliefs are wrong or bad. History is filled with both wonderful, and not so wonderful things that have occurred because of religious beliefs - hopefully a few more wonderful ones than the not so great. I still have plenty of my own spiritual beliefs that I hold to. The point is that Self inquiry is NOT about what is or isn't true, but rather about a DIRECT EXPERIENCE of Who You Are.
WHO IS AWARE OF QUESTIONS ARISING? (I AM)
For instance, it is my understanding that Buddha never spoke about God. There's been some issues because it's often considered that Buddhism is a "Godless" religion. But the Buddha's teaching were about the fact that there is suffering, and there is a way to end that suffering. Period! That's what it's about - NOT whether there is a supreme deity or not. It's practical advice on how to end suffering. Those teachings were turned into a religion.
Similarly, Self inquiry is not about whether there is a God or not, but rather literal Self-Realization - to realize, or actualize, or 'know' the Self, i.e. You AS YOU.
Now the simplest answer to who you are, is Awareness. But knowing that doesn't necessarily help you unless you can actually realize that. One clue is that anything you are AWARE OF is not who you are. For instance, you can be aware of space, or mind, or thoughts, or even infinity, but if you're aware OF them, then that's not who you are. But can you be aware OF awareness?? Not really. (Although trying to be aware of awareness can be fairly powerful in helping you to "get it".)
WHO IS AWARE OF AWARENESS? (I AM)
Here's a few more thoughts from Nisargadatta Maharaja:
"The 'I am' has brought you in. The 'I am' will take you out. The 'I am' is the door. Stay at it. It's open."
"Remain focused on the 'I am' till it goes into oblivion, then the eternal is, the Absolute is."
"Hold onto the 'I am' to exclusion of everything else. The 'I am' in movement creates the world, the 'I am' at peace becomes the Absolute."
A favorite book of mine is the Ashtavakra Gita, which is the discussion between a teacher and his student, while and after he is awakening to the Self. The fourth verse of the first chapter states:
yadi deham prthak krtya chiti vishramya tishthasi |
adhunaiva sukhi shanto bandhamukto bhavishyasi ||
"If you detach yourself from the body and simply abide in consciousness, even in this moment, you become happy, peaceful and free from bondage." - Ashtavakra Gita 1.4
And isn't that what everyone truly wants.....to be 1. Happy, 2. Peaceful, and 3. Free? That's what the "I Am" is - the ever present, already existing doorway to happiness, peace and freedom. So while fully abiding in the Self as Awareness may not seem easy at first - it IS simple! Just keep coming back to the "I am". It can be done anywhere at any time - all the time. Who is aware of reading, eating, driving, walking, breathing.....
WHO IS RESTING IN AWARENESS? (I AM)
with deep love
Aja
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Another good one, Aja. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteCharlie H
Thank you! ❤️🙏
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